Apologetically yours

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Source: Google Images

Dear Life, 

If there is one truth that surpasses every other truth existing in this world then it has to be this – 

~ I Love You ~ 

From the moment I was born I have been badly in love with you for you were the first thing I set my eyes on the moment I opened them. Since then till today I breathe you every moment and live you in my every breath. And yet somehow you keep giving me reasons to hate you. 

The day that uncle touched me wrongly was the first reason you ever gave me. All of ten, I kept crying the whole night not able to understand what I did wrong to deserve this. I always thought you loved me as much as I did. But that day for the first time I experienced your hatred towards me. 

When after a few years my heart broke, I experienced what it feels to be in pain. I didn’t want to live anymore for I felt everything had come to an end. And yet when I saw you I knew why I had to live. I had to live because I loved you with a madness only I knew of. 

Time flew by and soon it was time for me to go to my dream course. I was just at an arm’s length and was about to touch it when it vanished. If only I had the right words to describe how I felt at that moment. I didn’t even realize when you quietly came up behind me, held my hand and whispered,” Some dreams are meant to be broken, so that new ones can be built.” I remember staring into your beautiful eyes that moment and falling in love with you all over again. 

Things kept happening and I kept changing along with them to fit into the mould that you had set for me. The only thing that remained constant throughout this ordeal was YOU. Every time I felt let down I just had to look at you and I knew why I had to do what I had to. 

Had it not been for you, perhaps I would have given up long back on a lot of things, maybe that night when my father hit me badly for falling in love or maybe that day when I was denied what I wanted just because I was born a girl. Every heart break, every whiplash on my soul and all that escaped my lips was your name. I pinned for you, in every breathe, as I fought for you. You are my sole reason to survive. 

You are the biggest dream and the most beautiful reality for me and for you I am willing to die a thousand deaths each day, yet come out alive just to have a glimpse of you and bask in the warmth that you exude. I fight a new battle each day not knowing where is it going to lead; all I know is these battles keep me closer to you. And that is something I need to stay alive. 

I believe there is a reason why I was born and somewhere deep in some corner I know that reason is you. You chose me to be here and held my hand as I went through some of the toughest tests you had to put through. I love the way you challenge me each day with something new. More than solving the challenges I love trying to guess what’s up your sleeve now. 

Source: Google Images
You are the strictest teacher but then you are also the most loving mentor. If you have slapped me hard on my failures, you have also hugged me tightly on my victories. I remember your kisses adoring my forehead every time I did something to make you proud of me. And in days of darkness it is these warm memories that keep me warm and help me stay afloat. 

I know off late I have been failing in lot of tests and your faith in me and my ability is dwindling but I promise you I will be victorious once again, very soon.For nothing else, but only for you, to see that twinkle in our eyes that seems to say I am proud of you. If possible do forgive me for this.I promise - You keep giving me reasons to hate you and I will keep giving you reasons to love me with a newer penchant every day. And one day you will love me as madly as I love you. Hug me like never before and will never ever leave me thereafter.

Till that day, 

In anticipation, 
Yours Me 

P.S: Today's prompt is to write a letter to someone you wish could forgive you. I am linking this letter to Iwrite, Count Santulan's blog HERE. If you wish to know more or participate you can hop onto the link and see the other letter prompts for the days to come.

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