All about 4 A.M friends


“It’s the friends you can call up at 4 AM that matter.”  – Marlene Dietrich
Recently while surfing the net I came across this quote and it set my thinking horses running wild.
First thought 4 AM friends. What are they? To define a “4 AM friend” in my words, it would be a person whom you can call at 4 AM and not worry about what he/she will think. I am sure you would agree that 4 AM is an unearthly hour to call some one. But with this person you can share your feelings and emotions without the fear of being judged. It means that friend is there for you even at any time to listen to you pouring your heart out. Offering a handkerchief whenever you cry, giving a warm hug when you are feeling low and cheering with you when you are happy. You know that person would drop everything to be at your side on only one panic call from your end just saying “I need your help.” Sometimes you don’t even have to say those words and they are still understood.
Second thought – Do I have such 4 am friends? To which instantaneously the answer came – YES!! I do. 
Third thought – Am I such a friend to anyone? Now this was getting tougher. To find the answer to this question, I called up couple of my friends and I was pleasantly surprised by their answers. [All of them told me how dependable I was at any time – leave alone 4 am. I was their 24 X 7 friend. "Makes me feel very good!!"]
We are all surrounded by such “wonderful 4 am friends “in our lives – sometimes we recognize them, sometimes we don’t. To make it easy for you I am outlining the basic characteristics of them. They definitely have many more characteristics than these…but these basics are enough to recognize them after which you can keep on adding to your list.
  • Whenever you are in trouble their 1st question would be “Can I be of any help to you?”, rather than trying to probe into the exact details of the problem.
  • They don’t fight your battles / fights for you, because they trust you that you can manage and most importantly they know that you will let them know when you need their help.
  • Though initially they would give their views and opinions on your plans but in the end they would stand by you in whatever you do [Even if it is NOT what they said]
  • Incase you go against their wishes to do something and fail in that attempt they would NEVER say “I had told you so…” They will say “Happens yaar…part and parcel of lie. Forget it and move on.”
  • When you call them after a long time their 1st question will never be “It’s been long time you called me. You don’t call me nowadays. Seems you have forgotten me.”It will be, “Hey…wassup? Long time we haven’t spoken. How have you been? Sorry couldn’t call you since quite some time. How are things?
  • If someone talks badly about you in front of them they will fight with that person and tell him/her to be careful while talking about you. Surprisingly they will never come back to you and talk about that incident. And on being asked about it, they will just dismiss it by saying, “He/she was talking about rubbish about you. Nothing important.”
  • When you call them to say you are in love and you think you have found your soul mate they will definitely NOT panic and say,” Who is it? Why didn’t you tell me before? Do I know him/her? I need to meet him/her to decide whether you should go ahead or not. Don’t jump to things. Wait till I meet and conclude things.”
They will say,” WOW!!! I am so...ooo…oo...ooo happy for you. When are making us meet? I am sure he / she must be a wonderful person to know as you have chosen him/her. I wish you all the happiness – always.”

The list is endless…..But I hope these pointers help you recognize your 4 am friends and help you be one to your friends. Don’t fret incase you don’t have any such friend, you can still make one. Its never too late...!

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