Diary of a Lost Wanderer: Life's Instruction Booklet

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Dear Diary, 

Sometimes I wonder if LIFE is what I see for everyone. Mary Miss says for God all of us are equal. Then why is that Hari’s mother is always there to pick him up from school and mine isn’t. I also want to rush into her arms once school gets over just like he does. One Saturdays his father also comes along and then on Monday during break Hari talks about how they spent the Sunday together at some park having a picnic, dining at a fancy restaurant, or at a movie theater. All I do on Sundays is wake up late and eat what I want for breakfast instead of the daily cornflakes before turning on my PS3 for endless gaming sessions. But you know, Hari says he likes my life more. PS3, new clothes almost every month, no one to bother with anything – not even homework. 
 
Source: Google Images

I asked this question to Mom today when she returned from work, the look on her face said that even she didn’t know the answer. She just hugged me tightly before asking Maria to take me to my room as it was time for me to sleep. For the whole week my life was a balancing act on those two thin needles in a clock. And on the weekend, my parents weren’t to be disturbed as they were too tired after the whole week so I was allowed to do all that I wanted to. Ya, it does sound like fun. Having ice creams, eating burgers, ordering pizzas, playing the whole day and falling asleep whenever I felt like, now that was surely heaven. But in the hearts of it I would want to be Hari any day. Even at the cost of the occasional punishments he gets when his marks are less or he has a note in his diary from the teacher. 

Maybe this is what life is all about after all. Wanting what is not yours and not liking what’s yours. Mary Miss today told us God has given each one of us according to our needs and that is when I understood that perhaps Hari needs all that he has got and not me. And then another question came into my mind – How did God decide what I wanted? Did He ask me? Maybe He asked me when I was too small to understand all this and in that age this kind of life does look lucrative to nod a yes! 

Source: Google Images
Ah! Now it was all clear. The mess was all made by me. I had actually got what I had asked for, wasn’t that what we have learnt this week at school. Sigh! Now there was nothing that I could do but to wait for my next turn to ask something. I better be prepared for that. I will ask Hari for some ideas this time. But then, when will my turn to ask come? Who will tell me that? 

I wish life had an instruction booklet. 

Confused,
Myra

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