Meraki ~ 7

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4:15 am
Creative Khopcha

Today I tried again. Called her, in a vain hope that I will be heard. I had a lot to tell, to share, to crib and to rant. But just like everytime I wasn't heard, rather I heard all that she wanted to say. And before I realised it was time to hang up. 

It has always been like this, since ages. Why is it that then my heart expects it to be different every single time?Am I blind to not see all these things or that I choose to ignore it all because I just don't want to accept it?

People say Karma comes back to you and that what you do to others will happen to you too. Does that mean that someday she will call me wanting to speak to me and it will be me who won't be in the mood to hear? 

No, God forbid I would never want that to happen ever. I had promised her once I will be there for you always and I will do anything to stand true to my words. 

Unless ofcourse if I get the signs that she doesn't need me anymore in her life. That is when I will gracefully walk away wishing her the best in life knowing very well that she still has atleast one way to reach me just in case she wishes to. My email id! Even if I move countries and change numbers she can still find me , that is if she wants to.

But in that process am I not being used by her? Ha ha... just like someone had said once, "It is better to be useful than be useless!" Atleast someone finds me useful in some manner and that should be a solace enough for me. 

To use and be used, somewhere between these two words the life's meaning got a bit more hazier than before.

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