Lie & Identify ~ This week


SALT ~ This week ~ Lie

Like any child, I used to lie in my childhood for petty things. Not eating, not wanting to go to school, not feeling well etc etc. But as I grew up I reached a stage where one day someone lied to me very badly and it shook up my world. That is the day I realized what seemed till now as harmless fun could actually end up having devastating results. From that day I stopped lying and became brutally honest. Though honesty comes it with its own pros and cons I still try to stick to it the most as I don't want to hurt anyone with a lie.

Every time I meet someone, I categorize that person as black or white i.e good or bad. For me there is no grey. Either a person is good for me or is bad, he/she cannot be a combination both of them.Couple of months ago I encountered someone who came across as nice , warm and loving person. I categorized that person as white and befriended him. We started talking like normal friends and I tried to play my role to the T, being what I am as always. Some weeks later I came to know that everything that person had shared with me was a lie. He had laid the base of our friendship on lie which made the entire building shaky. I was hurt and shaken up for a long time. For initially like always I blamed myself for having trusted the wrong person. But then I realized trusting him was not wrong, he was wrong in breaking my trust.

Though today we are still on talking terms I find it extremely difficult to trust that person once again. I fail to understand why do people lie. Does it bring along a sense of comfort to them? If it does, do they know it is temporary as some day the truth stands to come out and then it is all over? Lies can be of two types one which are harmless and the others which are harmful. Even in Mahabharata it has been defined that a lie which has not been told like a lie and can save a life is not harmful. Given this fact, how many times do we actually think before saying a lie and trying to comfort someone with it?


Lesson Learnt : Never comfort anyone with a lie, the truth might hurt for a while. But that hurt is better than the pain a lie will bring along. It will damage the person beyond repair.
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PEPPER ~ This week ~ Identify

7 years ago I was a victim of cyber crime. My email ids were hacked, obnoxious emails sent from my id to all my friends and family in address book with an attempt to malign my name. Within span of few hours my world had come crashing down. Just few hours back I had a job, loving friends and a wonderful family around me. Just one email and the only thing clearly visible was doubt in each one of their eyes. And all that remained in my heart was fear - fear of trusting people.2 years back when I thought of starting a blog, the fear of that incident came to my mind and hence I decided to blog anonymously. Initially what began as fear has now evaporated completely; thanks to all of you!

You reiterated a fact of life for me - One wrong experience does not mean the end of the world. It just means you need to be more cautious than before when you tread on that path again.While eating grapes from a bunch you could actually have a sour one in between, that does not mean you stop eating grapes. You taught me it is we who make our identity and not our names. My past has got nothing to do with my present as it is over. What matters is my present as that will determine my future. What was, that was, it cannot be changed. But what is and can be makes the entire difference in the picture. You left me with a lesson - Trust is a gift worth giving to someone whom we need to identify. It is ok if sometimes it ends up in wrong hands but never make the same mistake in identifying people.

Today many of you are my friends who know me, not because you asked my name, but because it never mattered.It does not matter whether I am Sheila from Kanpur or a Surbhi from Delhi. It makes no difference as what we share is beyond names and identities. It is our thoughts which bind us and hence make this bond special.

And as Shakespeare had said, ' Whats in a name!!', truly there is nothing in a name. For I am what I am. Call me Me, Privy, Privy Trifles , PT or any other name you want to give me, neither does that change the person that I am nor does it change your feelings towards me.You have identified the real me and I have identified you and at the end of it all, that's what matters the most.

Lesson Learnt: Identifying the truly worthy people in your life comes with experience. That experience can be good and bad both but the lessons learnt are priceless.

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