Care and Concern ~ This week






SALT ~ This week ~Care

Recently I was chatting online with one of my cousins who lives abroad. We were talking online after some months, owning to our busy schedules. We have not met since past 2 years. But the magic and joy was still there in our conversation. It just did not feel as if we are talking after such a long time and the distance has not hampered it even a wee bit. 
I just wrote to her on chat, ' It is so sweet na..the way we can go on for hours together even after we meet after such a long time either on chat or in person.... :)'. She replied, ' Dee...you know the time we spend together in person is so beautiful that every phone call, messages, emails or chats make you relive that time.' I was touched. It was so true. Each time we have met we have planned everything in detail having loads of fun with each other and then reliving those moments when we catch up on line or on the phone. That was the truth of all our relationships. During the moments we are together we can lay base for wonderful memories which grow stronger and stronger with each interaction.

Lesson Learnt: In relationships Quality matters not the Quantity - Of love, time, care and concern.

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PEPPER ~ This week ~ Concern

Off late I have been meeting many people who believe in outshining others even in pain. Jokes apart, on a more serious note they are those types who would listen to your saga, say “That is nothing. Listen to what I have been through.” And start off with their story all in one breath. I find this entire thing to be very strange. It is possible they are saying this to make me feel better by making me look at problems worse than mine. But then I am sorry to say this action makes me feel anything but better. My first thought is do we need to be so competitive is almost everything that we do? I don’t know if the problem is with me, but I rarely find people who are patient listeners without being judgmental or opinionated about things. It is as if they derive some satisfaction by belittling others problems and glorifying theirs. They seem to have forgotten one fact – Only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches. Now when they ask you about your problem I start feeling that it was not out of concern, it was purely to lay hands on some juicy gossip to pass on to others. My immediate reaction is to shut off my mind completely. And put on my best fake smile to reply, 'Oh....nothing. Everything is just simply great. You tell me how are things at your end.' Though I might not mean this but I simply cannot share anything with such people.

I agree we cannot do much about every body’s problems. But genuine concern is all that is needed to make someone feel better. This brings us to the last thing- Do “genuine” people really exist in today’s world which is so full of deceit around us? I agree for arguments sake it can be said the reverse also. According to the law of probability the possibility of this happening is equal of the chance of it not happening at all. But then to the pessimistic mind, the chance of falling into that 50% of meeting such wrong people seems higher than meeting the right ones. Confused? Me too….. :)


Lesson Learnt : I had read this somewhere – cannot recollect by whom and where. Whenever anyone is in trouble, don’t ask what happened. Everyone will ask that leading to an uncomfortable situation for that person. Rather ask, Can I be of any help? This will put the person to ease.

Comments

  1. Shocked to see that such a nice post has no comments at all :-|
    First of all I don't have even a pinch of idea about this "Salt and Pepper". Is your own label or something else?

    Anyways I liked both the points which you have made.

    Regarding first point about the quality vs quantity . I would agree with your point but not completely (that's the beauty of discussion ;)). I feel quantity do matter which depends upon the kind of relationship you have. And how the base of it has formed? Sometimes we do look for quantity in things also and the same reason can be applied to here as well.

    Your second point is pretty interesting which try to ask lot things including answer to competition, finding a right person to discuss and only bearer can understand. Answer to competition is very difficult to give. That's why it is like "you scratch mine, I (or someone) will scratch yours).I believe many things are selfish. Unless and until the other person will not find the advantage from you, s/he will not jump into it.

    Sometimes back I wrote something on competition, if you want to have a look, you can browse through.It's not mandatory to look ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe ppl have become too speechless after reading this to comment ;)

      Salt and Pepper is a weekly feature on my blog where I write about one good and one not so good thing I came across during the week. So yes....my label!!

      M glad you liked my points and I feel the point ' agree but not completely' applies here as well. I believe that when a person shares something with you that person is already giving you his/her trust which should be considered as an advantage. What more could you ask for?

      Will surely read your post soon :)

      Delete
  2. Congratulations buddy.. :) very well done...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Care:

    Awesome...yup i have realised it myself too...It's never the quantity of time but the quality time that you spend with your close ones determines the bond between two relations...

    Concern:
    Everything is fake if you believe it that way but their are genuine concerned people if we think from the other prospective...
    i agree a person in trouble doesn't get much relief if a dozen people come up and ask what happened but if a single person could say if i can be of any help seeks more confidence than those dozen...

    This story reminded of a Recent Bengali movie Hemlock society...though am not fond of Bengali movies as most of them are Telugu (and i belong to those rare Bengali who loves Telugu Movies) remakes but this movie was based on the feeling you described...when somebody who discussed their problem at large we feel our problem is not that worth to be discussed...!!!

    good one...loved it...!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes...it never was about the quantity!

      In today's world there are a lot of fake people around us who show artificial concern and try to act as if they are our best well wishers in this world.

      P.S: I think we should exchange places then. Here I am in love with the Bong culture and there you are a Bong in love with Telugu movies :D

      Delete

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